1. Knifed in the gut while visiting young people
2. Accidentally drown while horsing around on a yacht with Jimmy Buffett
3. Choke on guacamole
5. Get caught in the crossfire of a narwhal fight
6. Hangglide into a poison factory whilst on fire
7. Ax to the groin or anything to the groin but mainly an axe
8. At the unforgiving hands of Nick Nolte
9. Sitting next to Grandma Agnes because of the racism
10. In Vermont
We're doing a members-only studio session with the very very funny Bob Odenkirk on Friday, October 24th at Mississippi Studios (3939 N. Mississippi Ave) at 4:30 (Doors at 4). You may know Bob as Saul from Breaking Bad, as the bumbling police chief from Fargo, or as half of the world's best comedy team on Mr. Show. This one's not to be missed. It's FREE & EXCLUSIVELY for members, so if you're not a member, JOIN TODAY!
Already a member? RSVP to firstname.lastname@example.org and let us know you'll be there! (NOTE: RSVP required as space is limited!)
Last week, the hilarious and loud Billy Eichner actually made David Letterman laugh (quite a feat!) with a great bit called "Celebrity Child or Kentucky Derby Winner":
After it aired, Live Wire's photographer, Jennie Baker emailed me and asked "On a past show, did Live Wire do a game asking someone to determine whether names on a list belonged to a Kentucky Derby horse or a celebrity's child?"
The answer is yes. In April of 2012, we recorded and aired a segment written and performed by Sean McGrath called, "Famous Race Horse or Child of Celebrity?"
Says McGrath about the coincidence: "If this was some Billy on the Street game that they did many years before I thought of it, then so be it and good for them. If not, then they should know I have plenty of ideas that are way better than that one that they shoulda stole."
They probably didn't steal the idea...comedy minds and the zeitgeist work in mysterious ways, and we're just a wee public radio show out of Portland with a podcast that can be heard worldwide. We're just saying that it sounds awfully familiar.
You can view our script and listen to our version from two years ago below. Eeeenteresting.
Pope Francis has been a bit controversial since his papacy began in March of 2013, due to what's perceived as his "more liberal" views and casual, conversational nature. We've discovered an internal memo outlining his schedule, which might provide some additional insight into his papal style.
It’s summertime in the Northwest and for a lot of folks (not us!) that means barbecuing and smoking a lot of marijuana (which we would never do!). But sometimes you can smoke too much, and then where are you? You’re eating potato salad with your Aunt Marge, desperately trying to keep it together. Well, here are a few activities and scenarios that have been scientifically proven to keep you from wigging out to the max.
Mowing the lawn
Shaving your animal
Think of your favorite whole number
Prepare for a religious holiday
Kres pillas der alfa moontin
Watch the film Berlin Alexanderplatz
Take off your pants
Even more marijuana
Try listening only with your hands
Make an enemies list
Give to public broadcasting
Switch to cocaine
Make 100 phone calls in 100 minutes
Make a wet snack
Take a shower while eating peanut butter and pleasuring yourself
Season: Spring 2014
Writer: Jason Rouse
Reason for rejection: Dumbness
Every year, we spend the summer thinking of ways to make Live Wire a better experience for our live and listening audience, and this summer we're hoping you can help us. We've created a short survey (4 minutes! That's just 1/14th of an Orange is the New Black episode!) with questions about your listening and internet habits and we hope you'll take the time to fill it out.
Everyone who does will be entered to win TWO FREE TICKETS to our blowout season opener on September 9th and two Live Wire t-shirts!
As always, thank you for your time and support of the show! Can't wait to see you in the fall!
~The Live Wire Crack Research Team*
*Not researching crack.
Podcasts are so ubiquitous that it seems everyone you meet has one. Because of this trend, we gave Todd Glass (host of the The Todd Glass Show podcast) a truncated version of the following quiz, asking him to indicate which of the podcasts listed were real (a PODCAST) or fake (a SHMODCAST). Take the quiz yourself, and check the answers below see how you do! (Then listen to Todd take the quiz...did you do better or worse than an actual podcast professional?)
1. THE TRUTH ABOUT CATS, DOGS AND LAWN CHEMICALS
Exploring the potentially hazardous health effects of lawn chemicals on your companion animals.
2. THE WAITING ROOM
Detroit standup comics Dean Travers and Shelly McMahon try to get regular people chatting while waiting for appointments in doctor’s offices, lawyer’s offices and principles offices.
3. WHAT WAS WAS NOT WAS
Music super producer and “Was Not Was” musician Don Was’ monthly all access pass to all things that were once Was but are no longer.
Regular Updates and entertainment on and about the pork industry from your most-trusted pork professionals.
5. THE YARNIACS!
Gayle and Sharlene talk about what they're wearing, stalking and knitting while keeping a pair of needles ready for that ever-elusive perfect yarn.
6. THAT’S NACHO CHEESE!
Blake Ormond chronicles his mission to eat nachos once a day for a year. Each week features a different bean, meat, and cheese. This week is the Bolivian Pinto, llama meat and Aged Norwegian Manchego.
7. THE CATHOLIC PILOT
Podcasting about aviation on a wing and a prayer with Captain Jeff. Near misses, turbulence and living our faith at home and the workplace.
8. WHAT IF?
This weekly podcast explores what the world would look like if Maximilien Robespierre didn’t lead an opposition to the French war with Austria in February 1792, but instead supported the efforts of Jacques Pierre Brissot, the leader of the Girondist party.
9. PODCAST ON PODCAST ON PODCAST
Ever wonder what happens during your favorite behind-the-scenes podcast, “Podcast on Podcast?” Podcaster Dave Johnson examines his process of going behind-the-scenes for his behind-the-scenes podcast about your favorite podcasts.
A podcast about sexual anthropomorphism, furries, spirituality and internet culture.
Hi. It's summer, and we miss you. We also miss beer and delicious hamburgers, so we'd like to invite you to a Live Wire Happy Hour at Bar Bar (3939 N. Mississippi) next Thursday the 26th from 6-8p.m. All are invited, but Live Wire Members will get free New Belgium Sunshine Wheat beer and delicious Bar Bar fries and sliders! (Not a member? Well, that's just nuts. Join here.)
Join us on the beautiful patio at Bar Bar for:
The winner of Cards Against Humanity will receive two free tickets to see The Von Trapps at Mississippi Studios that very night (6/26)!
Our staff, cast and crew would love to see you, so don't be a summer bummer and come out for the fun!
Sorry we said the summer bummer thing.
*Laughter is expected but not guaranteed.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
MINNEAPOLIS, March 31, 2014 – Public Radio International® today announced that it will add Live Wire! with host Luke Burbank to its portfolio beginning July 1, 2014. Live Wire!, a weekly, live variety program that features conversation and performance with authors, artists, and people doing remarkable things, broadens PRI’s offering of content that reveals the ways culture of all types influences our lives each day.
“PRI understands that people are inspired by all types of experiences: intellectual, artistic, serious and humorous. Live Wire! brings those experiences to audiences in ways that are relevant and energetic. We are delighted to be working with them. ” said Melinda Ward, Chief Content Officer of PRI.
Live Wire! launched in 2004. Developed by veteran radio and theater producers, the team at Live Wire! uses live theater to tell great stories, introduce new ideas, spark conversations, and make people laugh. Host Luke Burbank says of the show, “Portland has so much wisdom to share with the rest of the country: Can a baby pull off an ironic mustache? What's the best flannel to wear in the rain? Why is that bicyclist so mad? And now, thanks to our partnership with PRI, we finally can. By the way, it's ‘yes’ ‘none’ and ‘because, earth-killer’.”
Recorded from the Alberta Rose Theater in Portland, Oregon, Live Wire! has quickly built a loyal following over the air and as a podcast. Forty-eight stations across the U.S. currently air the program, bringing its lively sensibility to not only the loyal public radio audience, but also those hungry for insights from authors, filmmakers, thought-leaders, sports figures, politicians and foodies. Robyn Tenenbaum, Co-Creator and Executive Producer, commented, “We are thrilled to be partnering with PRI. When we started this show 10 years ago our goal was to be heard by ears across the country and around the world. Our loyal Portland audiences have been extremely supportive and have helped us grow. We currently air in some wonderful markets outside of Oregon including Seattle, Austin, Indianapolis, Pittsburgh, Cleveland, and we look forward to working with PRI to reach our true goal of World Domination.”
About PRI: At Public Radio International, we believe sharing powerful stories, encouraging exploration, and connecting people and cultures will effect positive change in the world. By building a deeper awareness and understanding of the world's peoples, conditions, issues and events, we enable others to form their own opinions, share their knowledge and creativity, and take informed actions on issues that matter to them.
Partnering with public media's most talented producers and hosts, we offer distinctly global voices on “PRI's The World®" and CBC shows like "As it Happens" and "Q with Jian Ghomeshi." We cultivate conversations representing diverse viewpoints on “The Takeaway,” “To the Point,” and "The Tavis Smiley Show." We present voices of culture, contemporary American life and artistry on "This American Life" and "Studio 360® from PRI and WNYC." And we provide decidedly fresh takes with "WireTap" and “The Tobolowsky Files.” PRI’s content is available on almost 900 public radio stations nationwide, at www.pri.org, and through podcasts and digital platforms.
About Live Wire: Live Wire is a weekly variety show that combines the excitement of a live show and the reach of a radio broadcast to entertain, inspire, and inform listeners. Taped in front of an enthusiastic live audience at the 400-seat Alberta Rose Theatre in Portland's historic Alberta Arts District, Live Wire is a unique blend of interviews, music, storytelling, and original sketch comedy. Live Wire airs on public radio stations across the country and is heard nationally and internationally through our podcasts. www.livewireradio.org